The Writer's Mind
by Aelaer
Summary: The imagination is a wondrous place, where both the best and the worst of fantasies are created. Unfortunately, Aragorn and Legolas have stumbled upon the worst.. dedicated to all of you Aragorn and Legolas tortureangst writers out there!
1. Chapter One

Title: The Writer's Mind  
Author: Ainu Laire  
Rating: K+  
Genre: Humor  
Summary: The imagination is a wondrous place, where both the best and the worst of fantasies are created. Unfortunately, Aragorn and Legolas have stumbled upon the worst…  
A/N: I was in the middle of reading some fan fiction pieces when this certain plot latched itself onto my leg and would not let go until I fulfilled its needs. This is a humor piece written in honor of all the Aragorn and Legolas torture writers out there. Big shout out to all those in the MC Yahoo Group!

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Chapter One

The Last Homely House was a place of peace and serenity. For those who knew of its location it was a place where they could recuperate after weeks of traveling the endless Wilds of Eriador. It was a place where no evil stirred and the only thing one would see were cheerful, smiling elves. Everyone with good intentions were welcome, and this haven was the nearest thing to perfect on Arda.

However, there was one that was not at peace at the moment. Deep in the folds of his covers, a man tumbled within his sheets, trapped within his nightmares that dark, cloudy night. For many years he had these dreams, though they became more frequent once he discovered his true identity. They nearly ceased to exist when he served in Rohan and Gondor, and whilst in Lórien he had none at all. But ever since he had returned to Imladris, they came back with increased power. And once more he dreamed.

He found himself yet again in a cell. The first time he had dreamt this at a mere thirteen summers, he was absolutely terrified. By the fifth time, he was slightly confused. When he came to the age of twenty, he was thoroughly annoyed and had lost count of how many times he dreamt this reoccurring nightmare (around thirty-two he had lost track). He was pretty sure that he had been in this cell, or something similar, at least one hundred times.

Not all his dreams were in cells, though a good amount of them were. Plenty of them were in the Wild, somehow in the hands of someone or something evil bent on destroying him or those closest to his heart. A few times he had been in a cave or a tunnel, usually with orcs. But then there was this one very odd time that he was with a wizard he had never met nor seen before… called himself 'Wizard of Many Colors'. He asked Gandalf if there was such a wizard, but Gandalf just chuckled in his face and shook his head, saying that he had too wild an imagination.

'_It is hardly my fault_,' thought the man darkly as he played with the straw in his cell. Almost all the cells looked the same; you'd think that they would be more creative. Chains, torture devices, cold stone walls and floors, locked iron doors, and sometimes some straw… never once had he seen something interesting or unique. Like a tree. A tree growing in the middle of a cell would be quite unusual. Of course, there were plenty of trees in the Wild where he was usually tied to and beaten… but never in a cell. Pity. It would give him something to do… he could climb it, try to carve into it with his fingernails and teeth, or construct a key out of woodchips… most entertaining.

And then, of course, there were the villains. He wasn't sure who or what it was in this certain dream, but he still recalled every villain from his past dreams. Bounty hunters, assassins, orcs, a random group of evil men, some elves with a grudge, Ringwraiths, Barrow-wights, undead spirits, and sometimes even the Dark Lord himself were in them. Then there were others… creatures he was sure did not exist. If he was being honest with himself, he was slightly concerned that his mind had come up with that half-elf, half-human woman who could transform into a dragon and had a grudge against men because of her father. It was hardly her father's fault that he was mortal, died, and his wife succumbed to grief and left that poor, innocent half-elf, half-human in the dark, lonely world to be raised by dragons… in fact, it wasn't really his fault either. So why did she capture him? It did not make any sense…

He blinked. He was thinking about the motives of odd villains in his dreams. While he was dreaming. He shook his head, and stared at the iron door. If this was a dream, why could he never turn that iron door into Arwen? Or make some type of key appear in his hand? Or make a tree sprout in the middle of the cell? He shook his head. If Legolas could hear his thoughts right now, he'd be doomed to live the rest of his life with the elf's taunting.

Legolas. Legolas appeared quite often in his dreams, alongside Elladan, Elrohir, or even Elrond and Thranduil. Most of the time they were being tortured with him, or trying to save him just to miserably fail. He didn't understand it. Every single time they came to rescue him, one of his captors happened to pass by and all hopes of escape were lost. It was very annoying. Occasionally Arwen would appear, which would lift his spirits immensely. First few times he was terrified to see her tortured alongside himself, but now he knows that after the torture they are usually left alone in the cell for a few hours… the only good part about these nightmares. Odd enough, his mother never appeared in them… he assumed he should be thankful. It was as if she did not exist, or as if she were dead… odd indeed.

He sighed. He at first feared these dreams, but now he was just thoroughly annoyed. He hadn't told anyone about them, afraid that they would think him crazy… or worse, hover over him like a mother hen and treat him as a child. Rolling his eyes, he wondered if they would ever realize that he was over fifty years old and not a child anymore.

Suddenly, he heard a key being put into the door. This door was fully made of iron and had no windows to look through, so he could not see who had captured him this time. He knew that it was a villain, for he was always tortured in his dreams, even if a rescuer came. He had to be physically, emotionally, or psychologically tortured every single time… sometimes combinations of two of them, or all three! It was quite frightening at first, but he was pretty sure he knew every single type of torture method by now.

He wondered who it would be this time. Easterlings or corsairs? Ringwraiths? Some odd creature that didn't exist? And then, what would be his purpose being there? Grudge against Elrond and his house or the Dúnedain? Someone after Isildur's heir? Or maybe someone who just wants a slave… well, there was only one way to find out.

The door finally swung open, and he blinked in surprise. Out of all people, he wasn't expecting him so early in the dream…

"Legolas?" asked the man.

"There you are, Aragorn. Come on, we must leave." Legolas stood impatiently at the door, tapping his foot in a most un-elflike manner.

Aragorn blinked. Finally, he shook his head. "No, it's pointless. Someone will soon be coming and we both will succumb to pain and torture. You'd best leave while you have the chance… though you probably won't make it. You never do."

"Aragorn! There is no time for this! Come on, we must-"

"No, really, Legolas, it is pointless. They always catch up in the end. Trust me, I've tried dozens of times to escape. But tell me, who are my captors this time? Orcs, men, some elves?" He idly played with the straw in his hand as Legolas stared at him with a frown.

"It is naught elves, men, nor orcs," said Legolas.

Aragorn looked up from the straw. "Really?" he asked, obvious interest in his voice. "That's good… they were getting predictable. So, what is it this time?"

"The same people that bring you here every single time. The same villains that bring you these horrific nightmares for their own entertainment."

Aragorn frowned. "You must be mistaken. I mean, that half-elf, half-human girl raised by dragons is certainly not the same thing as Sauron-"

"No, no, Aragorn. None of your enemies in your dreams have ever captured you."

"Well, obviously they have not taken me, I'm dreaming- say, how do you know this is a dream?"

Legolas' features darkened. "I too have had dreams like this, ever since I was an elfing. Dreams of capture and torture. Many of them were with my mother, who either was killed or sailed into the West… I haven't an idea why. She's perfectly fine with my father in Mirkwood."

Aragorn's brow furrowed with confusion. "Aren't you supposed to be in Mirkwood?"

"I am in Mirkwood, but I also am asleep. But ask no more questions until we are safely out of here! Trust me, my friend."

Aragorn bit his lip, and then nodded. "Alright. This dream is different from the rest… maybe you are indeed not a figment of my imagination."

Legolas smiled grimly. "I assure you, I am not. I also am trapped within this alternate reality between our world and theirs."

"Our world and theirs…?"

"No time for explanations! Let us leave!"


	2. Chapter Two

A/N: Hey guys! Thanks for the reviews. Responses are at the bottom :-) I hope you enjoy this as much as I enjoyed writing it!

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Chapter Two 

Aragorn had never been beyond the cells or the torture chambers in his dreams. He assumed that the places that he was always being held at were dark and evil. He was certain that they were all like Barad-dûr, considering that the Barad-dûr dungeons and the other dungeons were quite similar. It looked like he was wrong.

As they ran from the dungeons to the upper levels, the place became notably… brighter. And very, very lovely. Beige walls covered with exquisite paintings and tapestries were all around him, lit by decorated lanterns that gave quite a bit of light. He tried not to stop and stare at the detailed scenes before him, or the odd lanterns hanging above him. Legolas, however, seemed not to heed any of his surroundings, so Aragorn continued to follow him.

Suddenly, they came to an end to the long, straight hall. It split off in two directions. On the left hand side was a sign that said 'Rivendell'; on the right hand side was a sign that said 'Mirkwood'. Legolas stopped for half a second before turning to 'Rivendell', Aragorn's confusion rising.

"Legolas, do you care to explain to me what's going-"

"Quiet!" Legolas put his hand over the Ranger's mouth. "We approach their domain."

Aragorn frowned and broke free of the elf's grasp. Legolas took a couple more turns in the hallways, which looked more and more like the entrance to Rivendell. The detail was really quite amazing…

'_Wait a minute_,' thought Aragorn with a deep frown. '_This is much too detailed… oh Valar!_'

He had to hold back a gasp at the sight before his eyes. Somehow he had left the halls and was now right in front of the gates of Rivendell. But there was something wrong…

Legolas pulled Aragorn over to the side of the road, behind a clump of bushes. "Not is all as it seems, Aragorn," whispered the elf to the man. "That is not Rivendell… look. Do you see the thin pieces of black rope about? Those strange bright lanterns?"

Aragorn indeed saw them, and he nodded. "What are those things?"

"I know not for certain, my friend, but I do think that the thin ropes are called 'wires' and the odd lanterns are called 'lamps'… but it is not the lamp that gives off light, but a strange glass device called a 'light bulb' that does." Aragorn raised his eyebrow. "Here, let me tell you all of what I know.

"As you already know, I've been having nightmares since I was an elfing. All of them included me being in the hands of some type of enemy and they all included some type of torture. In many of them my mother passed away, or something terrible happened to those dear to me. Ever since I met you, my friend, they have become much, much worse. Always you and I are in some type of pain, and these nightmares never stopped. However, fortune looked down upon me this night.

"Instead of finding myself in a cell or imprisonment, I found myself right in this very spot. After waiting for a moment and not being captured, I decided to go into Rivendell when I noticed that I felt no elvish presence." Aragorn nodded. Now he knew what felt so odd… he didn't feel the comfortable atmosphere that Rivendell usually had. Legolas continued. "And then I noticed those long, thin black ropes and the odd lights. I knew then that something was wrong.

"Suddenly, the gates were opened, and out came a young woman… not even half your age, if I guessed correctly. She was muttering something that sounded like 'stupid wires…' and glared at those thin black ropes. So I think they are called wires. She went to the side of the gate and did something with the wires. Then she went back inside.

"I stayed here for a few hours, and heard much. Most who entered and left Rivendell were women ranging in all ages. They talked frequently about you and me and some horrors I cannot even imagine." He shuddered. "And they said it so enthusiastically! Tell me, Aragorn, is all the race of Men so cruel?"

"Nay," said Aragorn. "And women are usually much more gentle. What have we stumbled upon, my friend?"

"I know not," said Legolas. "Many terms I did not understand… some including 'computer', 'type', 'plot bunny', 'fan fiction', and other odd words. But as I listened, the girls here suddenly started panicking. I heard a very loud voice, though where it came from, I know not, but it said 'Attention all writers and readers: There has been a glitch in the system and both Aragorn and Legolas have disappeared. They were last seen in Mordor, being tortured. If you have any information on their whereabouts, please come to the Head Office immediately.'

"It was at this point that I knew I was not the only one trapped here, and I set to find you. After searching for hours, I finally found you in the dungeons… and here we are."

Aragorn frowned. "So, let me get this straight… for all these years of dreams, you believe that they were not just dreams, but the creations of psychotic women?" Legolas nodded solemnly. "But there are still many questions… how do you know this is not our world? What do these girls want with us? And what is 'fan fiction'?"

Legolas shook his head. "Well, I do believe that these strange women, odd 'wires' and 'light bulbs', and the fact that a hallway suddenly turned to the front entrance of Imladris should answer your first question. As for the others, I am not sure. But what we should be asking ourselves is what we are going to do now? It seems that the loud voice I heard sent a large panic into the multitudes of girls and women, and now they search for the both of us. I assume that they did not know that you were in the dungeons and I was in a tree.

"Obviously," said Aragorn wryly. "Well, what would you suggest, Thranduilion?"

"I would suggest us trying to stop these dreams from occurring once and for all, son of Arathorn," replied the elf.

"As would I," muttered Aragorn to himself. "And I think that however we shall stop these nightmares is inside Rivendell. What say you?"

"After you, Aragorn."

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Short chapter, I know. But the next chapter, and chapter four, are longer. 

Responses:

Shadowed Flames: Isn't it interesting how the smallest of things can be funny? We all know that trees are hilarious, after all ;-)

Viggomaniac: I am happy that it made you laugh! After all, that was the point of this story... that is why it is a humor story.. uhm... well, I am honored to be part of your C2 community. That is one of my favorite parts, too; poor Gilraen is never acknowledged... I wonder how -she- feels about that. Hehe, I also beg for more Aragorn torture when I read a story... it's a... weakness. A really bad one. I am writing a sequelish prequel to that other story... aka flashback... I'm not sure if I can add too much torture, because even though I love to read it, I'm not sure if I can write it... unless it is emotional torture... not sure where that came from, lol! Thanks for the review!

Legolas's Girl 9: Hey, I completely follow you. I'm an avid Aragorn torture/angst geek. I absolutely love his character... and I love to see him in pain. I haven't an idea why. Weird stuff in the mind, eh? ;-)

Meluivan Indil: I know what you mean... I being both a writer and reader of said tales, I completely understand you. I just started writing the torturey fics last month... started reading them a year ago... and it is so enjoyable! Glad you liked, and thanks for reviewing!


	3. Chapter Three

Hey guys! I'm really happy you are all enjoying this; this chapter was personally my favorite. I hope you enjoy. Review responses once more at the bottom.

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Chapter Three 

She was having a bad day. First thing in the morning she is woken up by a trumpet that one of the newbies had brought along just for the sake of annoying her. Then she gets a call that the electric box outside the gates is not working… seemingly all the wires connected to it are malfunctioning. She blamed the wires. Then some moron in security messed with the coordinates in the Main Control Room and now Aragorn and Legolas were missing. She hoped that the security guard was severely punished. Maybe by being assigned 'Sue guard duties… she smiled evilly.

And now, the coffee maker was broken. Trumpets, wires, and missing people she could handle, but when she didn't have her coffee, she went mad. She needed her coffee. She couldn't live without it. So now, she sat upon the front steps of the replica of Rivendell, trying to fix the coffee maker.

She was alone, for once. All of the writers were gone in search for the elf and ranger. She assumed that all the readers of Mirkwood were searching as well; after all, they did read the stuff. She shook her head. She couldn't care less if the Heads suddenly went missing. All she wanted was her coffee.

In her busy state of mind, she failed to notice two figures sneaking up on her. She did not fail to notice, however, herself being lifted up by two strong figures and being pushed against the wall. She also did not fail to notice that they had made her drop the coffee maker, which fell down to the ground and broke beyond repair. If she was angry before, now she was furious.

She was about to give the two who had picked her up a good tongue lashing when she found a hand to her throat, and keen, silver eyes piercing into hers. She gulped, all thoughts of coffee and tongue lashing gone.

"Who are you women and what do you want with us?" growled an irate Aragorn, not letting her go. He was weaponless, she noticed, but looked deadly. By his side was Legolas, who also was weaponless, but just as deadly. She gulped once more.

"Please, sir, I'm just the technician! I swear I don't write, or even read the fan fiction! Honest!"

Legolas stared her in the eye, and she turned her head away. Bloody elf had a stare that could make the dead rise. She turned to Aragorn, who had the same expression as Legolas. It irritated and frightened her.

"You shall answer our questions, and you shall answer them truthfully. Do you understand?" Isildur's heir commanded. She nodded meekly, and Aragorn finally let go of her throat. She took in a deep breath and gently massaged her neck as the two stared down at her.

"What is your name?" asked Legolas.

"I've got many. People here call me 'Tech Girl'. But you can call me Mandy."

"Alright, Mandy. Now, where are we and what do you want with us? Why do you invade our dreams?"

"You're in an alternate universe, if you want to be precise. Not in Middle-earth, nor in my home world, Earth. Right in the middle, it seems. And _I_ don't want anything with you guys. It's the authors and reviewers that want you. I could care less; I'm just here because it pays well."

"Explain."

"Well, I don't know all the details, but one day a couple people came together to form this place. These women wrote stories about you two and constant adventures, angst, and tortures you went through. With fellow writers and reviewers, they built this place a couple of years ago. I wasn't here yet, so I don't know all the details. But somehow, ever since they came here, their stories somehow came to your dreams. I don't know how or why, but they just started to. By the time the Heads found out about this, it was too late to move back. So the writers are all under strict regulations not to mess around too much, and to make sure that not too many people are writing around the same period of time in which the story takes place. But someone in security messed with the control system and it looks like you two accidentally came here. That's pretty much about it."

"Explain more about these 'authors', 'reviewers', and 'fan fiction'," the elf said.

"Fan fiction is pretty much stories based on char- people that we did not create. In this place, it is mostly for you two. The authors are the people who create and write these pieces of fan fiction that you two dream about at night. The reviewers read the stories and comment on them. The reviewers and writers are like a fuel and car relationship… you know what I mean?"

"Well-"

"Good. Well then, I'll just be on my way then." Mandy hastily went up to her feet and tried to get past them. She miserably failed.

Legolas looked at Aragorn. "It looks like we must destroy the authors."

"No, no!" protested Mandy. "That wouldn't be good at all! Who would give me my paycheck?"

"What then would you suggest?" growled Aragorn in frustration.

"Easy. Go to the source of the problem. The fan fiction itself."

"And where could we find this 'fan fiction' of yours?" Legolas asked.

"In the main hall, on all the computers. They're all stored away on the computers."

"Good," said Aragorn. "You shall lead the way and show us these 'computers'."

Mandy groaned, but was given no chance to argue. She reluctantly led the two friends to the main hall, where the heart of this place rested… within the fan fiction.

Aragorn stared at the wondrous horror that filled the main Hall. In Rivendell, this is where everyone usually ate breakfast and supper. Here, however, the tables were covered in many of the odd 'wires', and those wires were all connected to a bunch of large silver and black boxes. Some of the boxes were under the tables, and they were covered in many buttons. The ones on top were either large or flat and all had a black square on the front of it.

Even these odd devices, however, did not add up to the shock and horror of seeing pictures of himself and Legolas plastered all over the place. Some stances were just portraits; others had him and Legolas fighting orcs, wargs, or other types of evil, and some had him and in his friend in the worst type of situations- many, oddly enough, that looked like scenes from his dreams. He shuddered, and looked to Legolas. Legolas had a similar expression of horror on his face.

"Okay, those are the computers under the tables. Those are the monitors on top. To put it simply, the computer is like, the brain of the whole system. Monitors make it possible to actually do something with the computers. Whatever you make on the monitor is stored onto the computer."

"There are many," muttered Legolas. "Is there not one main 'computer'?"

"Yea, but it's in the Head's Quarters. No one but select people have access to it. I'm not one of them," Mandy explained. "So, if you want to slow production down to pretty much a stop, you've gotta destroy all of these."

"How?" asked Aragorn.

"How? I dunno. Throw them across the room or something?" She shrugged. "I wasn't hired for my creativity."

"They can be destroyed that simply?" asked Legolas.

"Yea. They aren't like the Ring or nothing."

"The Ring?"

"Crap. Forget I said that, ok?"

"Erm, sure-"

"Great. You two have fun." Faster than thought possible, she ran out of the Main Hall.

Legolas and Aragorn looked at each other. "Shall we?" asked Aragorn.

"After you."

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Responses: 

Sweet-haret179: Thinking on a Saturday? That's impossible... anyhow, I am very glad you are enjoying this story :-D

Meluvian Indil: It's the smaller details that make something good, IMO. I hope you like this chapter as well.

Imbecamiel: I'm in the exact same state of mind; when I wrote this, I realized how mean I was to them... and then I realized that it was much too fun being mean to them to stop. Besides, they'll have their fun...

Legolas's Girl 9: Two thumbs? Not like... five? Aww... hehe, j/k. I'm glad you like it!

Easternelvenlady: Cute... hmm. Yes. That's a word that can be used; wouldn't you say so, Aragorn?  
Aragorn: -mutters dark threats under his breath-  
-pats him- I'm glad you like it :-D

SmilingDragonGirl: Ooh, one of these type of reviews! I love these! I write the same type of reviews... long, humourous, and utterly pointless. -grin- Well, we all knew that they'd come sooner or later, right? ;-) Big boy? -bursts out laughing- He's a coward!  
Aragorn: -grabs Anduril and starts after her-  
Gah! Peace, ranger! Peace! -throws him a bag of cookies- Rangers love cookies. It works every time.  
Anyhow, I tortured the ranger a bit in my last fan fic... and I entered a nice torture-fic in a contest a few weeks ago... it is soo much fun! Oh, and of course, there is the pissed off horse... can't live without that. Caves? Let me in those caves! I need a place to hide too! Ooh, but not with the horse... no, I don't want an angry elven horse at the moment, thankyouverymuch :P Indeed, I'm quite happy steedless... but speaking of torture-fics, I really need to work on this one that is a sequel to my last one... thanks for the entertaining review!


	4. Chapter Four

Hi guys! Thanks for all of the reviews! I just wanted you to know that this is the second-to-last chapter; however, I do plan on writing a sequel. Stupid plot bit me harder than anything else, and I just have to write it. In the next chapter there will be a preview type thing...

Reviews at the bottom. Hope you all enjoy!

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Chapter Four 

The writers had been looking for hours, and were exhausted. They headed back to Rivendell for some much needed rest, for tomorrow they would continue their search.

One exceptionally optimistic and hyper young girl was not daunted. Indeed, she was quite excited about the whole thing. Nothing really happened around there, and this was a nice change of pace.

Indeed, she felt so good that she decided to go to the Main Hall and type a bit of her first fic, in which Aragorn and Legolas were captured by orcs for no apparent reason. She didn't need an explanation; she just liked the pointless torture.

She broke away from the main crowd and skipped to the Main Hall, thinking about an amazing plot twist, in which the orcs suddenly decided to kill off one of them-

When she reached the main hall, she stopped skipping. Her mouth dropped and her eyes jumped out of their sockets. And then she let out an ear piercing scream, one that could only be made by a young, hyper teenage angst writer who had just seen possibly the best, and yet the worst thing possible.

0O0O0O0O

Legolas winced as the scream nearly broke his delicate eardrums. He had just finished throwing the last computer to the far wall as Aragorn frantically tore at the numerous pictures of themselves hanging on walls. He turned to the source and saw a girl screaming her head off.

"I FOUND THEM! I FOUND THEM! I FOU-"

Aragorn, who was closest, quickly grabbed her and covered her mouth, muffling her cries. He looked frantically at Legolas. "What do we do?" he asked as she started struggling in his grasp.

Legolas made for the entranceway. "Take her with us!"

"What!"

"We can't let her go!"

"True-"

"Come on!"

They rushed out of the Main Hall and through the corridors. All around them, they heard the pounding of many rushing feet, all headed in their general direction. Legolas led Aragorn and their struggling captive to the front of Rivendell.

As Legolas turned the corner, he suddenly bumped into someone who was rushing in the opposite direction. Instinctively he grabbed for their neck and started to squeeze.

"Legolas! Stop killing her!"

Legolas blinked and saw that he was choking Mandy to death. He quickly let her go, and she went to the floor, gasping. He picked her up from the ground and led her to the front of Rivendell.

Thankfully, no one was outside yet; all were probably in the Main Hall, looking at horror at their destroyed computers.

The elf nearly pushed Mandy out of the front gates (which were thankfully still open), and Aragorn still carried the girl, who had stopped struggling and had a look in her eyes that was similar to joy, as if she finally realized that she was being carried by Aragorn.

Legolas pulled Mandy behind a tree, and Aragorn followed. "Sorry, Mandy," he whispered. "Instinct, you see."

Mandy rubbed her neck. "Second time today," she muttered. "I swear, if I don't get a pay raise for this, I'm quitting."

"Mandy," interrupted Legolas. "We destroyed the computers. Now we need to get out of here! Tell us how to get out!"

"Ok, ok," she muttered. "We'll need to get to the Main Control Room. There I can probably refigure the coordinates and get you two back to your beds, in the exact time that you came here."

"Will the dreams cease?" Aragorn asked.

"I think so; after this catastrophe, I don't think the Heads would risk it. I imagine that we'll move back to Earth, so you shouldn't be affected anymore… hey, who's she?"

Aragorn looked down at the girl in his arms. She was looking at him with an odd look in her eyes. He blinked. "I'm not sure. She started screaming, so… well, we couldn't leave her there to tell the others where we went!"

Mandy nodded. "I see…" She bent down in front of the girl. "If he removes his hand from your mouth, do you promise not to scream?" She nodded. Mandy looked up at Aragorn, and he removed his hand.

"Wow, hi Tech Girl! Are these really Aragorn and Legolas? Are you in league with them? Are you conspiring against the Heads? Where are we going? Are-"

"Hey, shut up," Mandy said, eyes narrowed. The girl shut up. "What's your name?"

"Lothirieniel Moonflower of-"

"Real name."

"Brittany."

"Well, Brittany," started Mandy. "Yes, they are really Aragorn and Legolas. No, I'm not in league with them. No, I'm not conspiring against the Heads. And where we are going is none of your business."

"But-"

"No buts. Did you see those destroyed computers in the Main Hall?"

"Yea, did they do-"

"Yes, they did."

Brittany looked up at Aragorn. "Why'd you do that, Aragorn?"

Aragorn suddenly felt very uncomfortable. Her big eyes were boring into him, and it was unnerving. "Well, you see-"

"You don't like it?" Her lips quivered.

"Well, er-"

"No, we don't. The horrendous tales give us horrifying nightmares," said Legolas bluntly. Her big eyes turned to him, and suddenly the elf felt uncomfortable.

"They do?"

"Yes. Do you like nightmares?" Mandy asked her.

"No…"

"Well, can you imagine all the nightmares they have? All those stories you write about them are in their dreams. All those stories of capture and torture, and other terrible things… would you like those type of dreams?"

She shook her head. "No, Tech Girl, I wouldn't."

"Call me Mandy," muttered the young woman. "Tech Girl is just annoying."

"Oh, sorry-"

"Never mind it. Anyhow, in order to stop those nightmares, they had to destroy the computers. Now we need to get them back home."

"I want to help!"

"You will." Mandy smiled at her. "We need you to do two things."

"Yea?"

"You need to distract the others while we go into the Main Control Room and…"

"And?"

"You can never tell of this to anyone."

"What!" Brittany pouted, but looked at Mandy's face and immediately stopped. "Fine then. I'll help."

"Thank you, child," said Aragorn with a rare smile. She beamed. Legolas looked at her in slight amusement. She beamed even more.

"So… what should I do?" she asked.

"You'll think of something. We need to go. Now." She pushed Brittany out of the hiding place and towards the Rivendell look-alike. "Get inside and distract them!" Brittany sent them all one last look, her eyes lingering on the elf in an odd fan girl lust. The elf shuddered. Finally, she turned and ran inside to do her job.

"Come on, guys. Follow me." Mandy led them through the brush and trees and they followed quietly. So quietly that sometimes she turned around to see if they were still following her, and found them but a couple feet behind her. The bloody ranger and elf were too quiet for their own good, or so she thought.

Soon the woods turned once more into halls. She led them quickly down the hallway, and they came upon the bend where they had turned for Rivendell. Ignoring the 'Mirkwood' sign, she turned right to the original corridor filled with the bright lights and exquisite décor. Going to the first tapestry hanging on the wall, she lifted it up, and they were surprised to find a door there. She quickly opened it and ushered them inside.

They found themselves in a corridor, lit by small, plain lights. At the end of the hall was another door, only made of a strong silver metal. There was a strange device to the left of it on the wall. Mandy walked to it and pressed the buttons on the device in a long, complicated order. When she was done, the door automatically opened.

The three were now in the Main Control Room. Filled with many large screens and hundreds of buttons and gadgets and flashing lights, it looked complicated to control. On some of the smaller screens they saw images of the halls, of Rivendell, and of Mirkwood. Every now and then a person would pass by in a rushed pace, but otherwise, nothing happened.

"Those are the security cameras. I'm surprised that they didn't catch you earlier… I'm surprised that no one is here watching them! Where's security?" She sighed. "Unreliable, very unreliable… well, makes my job easier…"

"There are these… cameras… everywhere in this place?" Legolas asked, and Mandy nodded. "Why did we not see them? And why are they not in the dungeons? If indeed they can see anywhere, I would think that they would be in the dungeons as well."

"They're hidden. You're not supposed to see them," she said briskly as she started pressing buttons, turning gadgets, and typing coordinates into the main computer. Then she stopped, and looked up at him. "Wait. Did you say dungeons? We don't have dungeons."

"But you do," said Aragorn. "That is where I found myself when I first came here."

Mandy shook her head. "Impossible. We've never had dungeons. I'm positive." She paused. "Unless…" She went to another computer and started typing rapidly at it. Once she was done, a bright blue image flashed onto the screen. Her eyes widened, and she muttered, "Oh my god…"

"What is wrong?" demanded the both of them.

"That bloody, stupid, son of a-"

"Mandy!" shouted Aragorn in a commanding voice.

She stopped mid-curse, and took a deep breath. "You remember how I told you earlier that someone in security messed with the coordinates?" They nodded. "Well… we thought it was just the ff universe coordinates. It looks like that the same idiot also messed with the coordinates that keeps this place looking like it is. Along with dungeons, it seems that we also have a warg cage, a dragon's den, and, odd enough, a bright pink castle right on the edge of Mirkwood. I suppose you two going missing created so much chaos that no one noticed. I'm sure they will soon, though. It will take hours to get this place right again." She growled. "I hope that… that person got what she deserves." She sighed. "Anyhow, I got the coordinates set up for you. You should find yourselves awake in bed in a few minutes."

Legolas looked somewhat impressed. It takes a lot to get an elf to be somewhat impressed; completely impressed is near impossible. "That was fast." He paused. "Thank you, Mandy, for your help." Aragorn nodded in agreement.

She shrugged. "Eh, wasn't any real problem. I mean… well, it was our fault in the first place." She sighed, and yawned.

"Tired?" asked Aragorn.

"Yup; I didn't get my coffee today. The machine was broken. I was fixing it, but then… you two came along and made me drop it."

"Oh, I'm sorry-"

"No, no, it's fine. I'll just get another one. But speaking of tired," she grinned, "you two will feel tired very soon. You're leaving now. Look."

Aragorn and Legolas looked down at themselves, and were amazed to see that they were indeed fading.

"Farewell," Legolas said. "We shall never forget you or this place."

"Yea, I won't forget you either," responded Mandy. "Oh, and remember to hope and pray for two small people in the darkest of places! Don't lose your hope and faith in them! Don't get killed by orcs before you're over 200, Aragorn! Legolas, dwarves rock! Ok, have a nice life!" Before they could respond to her odd comments, they faded completely.

Once they were gone, Mandy let out a grin. The Heads would kill her if they knew what she had just hinted at… she shrugged to herself. Oh well.

Whistling, she left the Main Control Room and headed back to Rivendell.

* * *

Legolass Q: I also am a guilty one -grins- A very guilty one... both read and write it! BTW, I cannot wait for your next fan fic (for you must have more, really... I absolutely love your writing!) 

Legolas's Girl 9: You only have two thumbs? What sort of inhuman creature are you? ;-) And... if Lost Writer wants to hurt Legolas, that's all handy-dandy with me. But if she wants to hurt Aragorn... even better! -evil grin- I'm such an angst/torture addict.

Sweet-haret179: 10:30 in the morning? Are you crazy? I don't get up until... 12 at the earliest... must be those late nights writing or something -grin- I also felt for the comps... I gave them a funeral. May they rest in peace -bows head in reverence-

Meluivan Indil: 'Fall Into Middle-earth stories' are usually very boring and uncreative, so I skip past them myself. I usually only read them if they have original humor, original plots, or very canon characters (as in they don't trust the bloody person right away! Sheesh). Oh, I've felt bad at times, too... but it's much too fun to torture them a bit -grin-. Eh, call this story my redemption... because the one I'm currently writing isn't all that nice to Aragorn -another evil grin-

SmilingDragonGirl: -grin- I love writing long and funny reviews; and I love reading them! You are one of the only people who has reviewed my stories that has done so, and I really like it :-) I'm not sure if cookies work with them... why don't you try it? Maybe it will work on that odd horse of yours! I'm very happy that you are enjoying it; it makes me happy :-) If they actually managed to touch the fan fiction and do something with the work itself... I would certainly kill them. I need my daily dose of fan fiction... daily. Because it is a daily dose. Wow, that sounded stupid. Ack, alright, I don't want to go to the caves! Is your wardrobe big enough to fit a couple hundred of us? If so, let me in! I think they'd still go after you; I mean, you are writing it still... so just to be safe, you need to hide as well. With a computer and internet access, naturally. Ooh, a review from the horse? Let us see! -reads- Wow, that's some deep character analysis. -bows to the horse- I thank you for such indepth thoughts and superior knowledge. Thanks again for the review, both of you! ;-)


	5. Chapter Five

Last chapter! Thanks for sticking around. There is going to be a sequel, and the little preview/trailer thingy will be right after this short chapter. I'll start posting the sequel sometimenear the beginning of June.It will be longer and darker, yet still in the humor genre.Thanks for all of your support!

* * *

Chapter Five

Mandy was packing her bags in her small room, ready to leave, along with everyone else. After the catastrophe just a week ago, everyone was now moving back into the real world. No more would their writings plague their heroes dreams.

Brittany, she found out later, had done her job well. The young girl had stumbled upon the bright pink castle and had led everyone to it, keeping them distracted for a long time. When the Heads found about the castle, they themselves went to the Main Control Room, and Mandy looked at them for the first time. They were… well, they were actually not that impressive. Especially compared to Aragorn and Legolas. But then again, they were only fan fiction writers.

The Heads were furious when they saw what had been added, and once they fixed it, they found out what had happened to all of the computers. This had been the last straw. This place was already having problems managing, but after this… they could not live here anymore. And it was at that moment when they ordered everyone out.

So here she was, packing. She was never found out, and for that, she was happy. She was even happier that now people called her 'Mandy' due to Brittany's insistence to pretty much everyone around her. And what made her happiest was that she got a new coffeemaker. Life couldn't be better.

She hoped that Aragorn and Legolas were doing as well as her.

O0O0O0O

And indeed, they were. Legolas could finally, after many long years of restless nights, get some well-deserved rest and dreamless sleep. His spirits had risen, and the change on the elf prince overnight was seen by all who knew him. He laughed more, smiled often, and was just an overall more cheerful person. This, in turn, made his parents very happy, which made the whole of Mirkwood happy. Everyone was very, very happy.

In Rivendell, things were about the same. Aragorn caught up on some much needed rest, and he too went through a change in attitude. It was as if he were 30 years younger; as if he were still Estel of Rivendell instead of Aragorn, son of Arathorn, Isildur's heir. He did not look as tired, nor act as grim as he used to be.

The people of these two realms wondered what had happened to the two, but thought not too much about it. After all, they were happy, and there is nothing bad in that.

As Aragorn lay his head on his pillow one night, he smiled. No more disturbing dreams to keep him awake. No more thoughts of torture and pain. No more 'fan fiction', as he recalled Mandy calling it. Yes, they had moved. They were back in their own world, and he was in his.

And the heir of Isildur slept a dreamless sleep.

* * *

Preview for The Sequel:

Something has happened…

"Up on your feet, tark!"

And history has rewritten itself…

Once he was down, it was but a moment before Aragorn had fallen as well.

And now, doom is soon to come to their world…

He looked up at the Black Gate and tried to keep the fear out of his eyes. There was no chance of survival now.

Unless if another can help them.

"Legolas, it's nice to see you and all, but I really need some sleep. So… go away."

And with a band of unlikely heroes, maybe they can set the course of time straight…

"I swear if you don't get out of bed right now I'm leaving without you!"

"Leave without me, then!"

"You stupid little brat- hey! DON'T TOUCH THE COFFEEPOT!"

That is, of course, if they can survive their world.

"I said to look both ways before crossing for a good reason! Now let's get you inside so you can watch some safety videos... yes, safety videos. Come on now. Inside. Now... INSIDE ALREADY BEFORE I HAVE TO DRAG YOU!"

Rewritting Time  
By Ainu Laire  
Coming June 2005

* * *

Meluivan Indil: I'm glad you like her. She shall be in the sequel because she is probably one of my favorite OCs that I have ever created. Glad you liked it :-)

Legolas's Girl 9/Lost Writer: Hurt them, eh? Well... I suppose that's what sequels are for :-)

aurorabluex: I'm glad you enjoyed it! I definitely know that... I have read terrible parodies that just make me want to throw the computer across the room. Well, not really. But thanks for the review :-)

SmilingDragonGirl: Eek, poor wardrobe! Well, if it is like the wardrobe like in 'The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe', then it should fit in everyone... ;-) But clever excuse for that odd wardrobe! It is full-proof... no one will suspect what really lies in there, no? Aww, poor horsey... well, no, not really. Hehehehe. Clever! Is therekaroke and refreshments in that dimensional gateway?If so, count me there! I've already hiredtwo bodyguards for my computer-grin- The pink castle... isscary. Very scary.-hides from it- Aww...well, one day you shall see Legolas! But really, he's not much fun. He's quite mean, actually... wasn'tvery nice to mein the couple times I've met him :-(And I bow to the horse -bows- I am humbled by his compliments. I think every word in there was English... indeed, I did not know that it wasn't your first language! You are very good at it, considering how hard English is to learn! Thanks for the review!


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